Special Boy With Freakishly Large Brain Wins Spelling Bee
Special Boy With Freakishly Large Brain Wins Spelling Bee
On Today Now!, Jim and Tracy meet James Kimura, a 12-year-old afflicted with the ability to spell long words normal kids don't even care about.
Tagged as: | theonion | funny | general
Funny Newspaper Headlines
If you've ever been up late at night, you've probably seen Jay Leno's headlines. If not here's a quick preview. Nice for a good Friday Laugh !
BTW - It was a bit hard trying to find a Leno video so I don't know if the video at the link below will continue to work. NBC seems to be taking them down from various sites along the web. So watch it while it lasts !
Tagged as: | funny | humor | headlines | spelling | newspapers
Plan for the Improvement of English Spelling
[Editos Notee: Here is one of my favorite articles about spelling. It was orginally credited to Mark Twain, but there is some debate that it should be attributed to M.J. Yilz]
...
For example, in Year 1 that useless letter "c" would be dropped to be replased either by "k" or "s", and likewise "x" would no longer be part of the alphabet.
The only kase in which "c" would be retained would be the "ch" formation, which will be dealt with later.
Year 2 might reform "w" spelling, so that "which" and "one" would take the same konsonant, wile Year 3 might well abolish "y" replasing it with "i" and iear 4 might fiks the "g/j" anomali wonse and for all.
Jenerally, then, the improvement would kontinue iear bai iear with iear 5 doing awai with useless double konsonants, and iears 6-12 or so modifaiing vowlz and the rimeining voist and unvoist konsonants.
Bai iear 15 or sou, it wud fainali bi posibl tu meik ius ov thi ridandant letez "c", "y" and "x" -- bai now jast a memori in the maindz ov ould doderez -- tu riplais "ch", "sh", and "th" rispektivli.
Fainali, xen, aafte sam 20 iers ov orxogrefkl riform, wi wud hev a lojikl, kohirnt speling in ius xrewawt xe Ingliy-spiking werld.
...
The link below is to a more serious document from Mark Twain regarding the simplificaiton of our alpha bet
Tagged as: | funny | spelling | grammer | humor | jokes | mark twain
Why English is so hard
We'll begin with box, and the plural is boxes;
But the plural of ox should be oxen, not oxes.
Then one fowl is goose, but two are called geese,
Yet the plural of moose should never be meese.
You may find a lone mouse or a whole lot of mice,
But the plural of house is houses, not hice.
If the plural of man is always called men,
Why shouldn't the plural of pan be called pen?
The cow in the plural may be cows or kine,
But the plural of vow is vows, not vine.
And I speak of a foot, and you show me your feet,
But I give a boot -- would a pair be called beet?
If one is a tooth and a whole set are teeth,
Why shouldn't the plural of booth be called beeth?
Then one may be that, and three may be those,
Yet the plural of hat would never be hose.
We speak of a brother, and also of brethren,
But though we say mother, we never say methren.
The masculine pronouns are he, his and him,
But imagine the feminine she, shis, and shim!
So our English, I think you will all agree,
Is the trickiest language you ever did see.
When the English tongue we speak
Why is break not rhymed with freak?
We say sew but likewise few;
And the maker of a verse
Cannot cap his horse with worse?
Beard sounds not the same as heard;
Cord is different from word.
Cow is cow, but low is low;
Shoe is never rhymed with foe.
Think of hose and dose and lose;
And of goose and yet of choose.
Think of tomb and comb and bomb,
Doll and roll and home and some,
And since pay is rhymed with say,
Why not paid with said, I pray?
We have blood and food and good,
Mould is not rhymed with could,
Wherefore done but gone and lone.
Is there any reason known?
So in short it seems to me
Sounds and letters disagree.
Tagged as: | funny | grammer | spelling | english | language
33 Funny Exam Answers
Here's a list of funny answers written on exams. Who knows if people actually put these answers down, but this is by far one of my favorite lists of funny errors. Given my bad grammar, it's definitely possible, I might have made some of these same mistakes
Tagged as: | funny | humor | exams | answers | grammer | spelling
